My sinister plan

I want to start smoking so I can quit, and then keep track of what I would be spending on cigarettes each day if I were smoking, and then use that money to buy an IBM ThinkPad. Also, if I started smoking, I could get paid to do lots of medical studies, because they're always looking for smokers who are looking to quit to try out their new medications.

I guess I could just pretend I just quit smoking and keep track of what I would be spending on cigarettes if I were ever a smoker. I don't even know how much cigarettes cost.

Of course, I am graduating soon. Maybe my parents will give me a kick-ass gift of lots of cigarettes. Then I can start smoking and follow through with the rest of my plan. It's perfect!

Right now, Lisa is driving to Colorado with her friends, and Sammy is driving to Boston all alone in his car (his Pappy and Step-Mammy are in their truck, which is full of Sammy's furniture). Sammy's called me about infinity times so far today. He's pretty bored. I told him to rent an audiobook from the library, but I don't think he did. Maybe there is something good on NPR that he can listen to. I've never had to drive so far by myself. What should he do? My dad drives long distances by himself. I'll ask him what he does to pass the time.