A reading from the book of Emily
I asked Professor Silevitch, my old electromagnetics professor, if he would write a recommendation letter for me so I can start my job as a tutor. He told me to write the letter and he would "massage" it if he felt like it. First I was delighted, but now I'm just not sure...what do I say? It feels weird to write out all these nice things about myself. I think I'm just going to copy down some of the psalms or something, but I'll substitute my own name wherever it says God, or Jesus or whatever. For example, I can write something like:
Emily is my shepherd. I shall not want.or
The heavens declare the glory of Emily; and the firmament sheweth her handywork.or
Emily so loved the world, that she gave her only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in her should not perish, but have everlasting life.That reminds me, remember how people used to hold up signs that said "John 3:16" at sports events? Does anyone do that anymore?
posted by Emily P @ 11:57:00 PM
4 Comments:
Emily destroyed from among you everyone who followed the Baal of Peor, but all of you who held fast to Emily are still alive today.
Deuteronomy 4:3
Emily commanded us to obey all these decrees and to fear Emily, so that we might always prosper and be kept alive, as is the case today.
Deuteronomy 6:19
That is some funny blasphemy.
And the priest hath commanded, and they have drawn out Emily, in which the plague 'is', and have cast her unto the outside of the city, unto an unclean place.
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